I was talking with a good friend of mine last night and we began talking about success and how people view success differently. I have actually been working on this piece for a few weeks but couldn’t quite put the finishing touches on my thoughts until now. SUCCESS…how people view success is an important question for me to ask when I am beginning to engage with people because it gives a pretty accurate view of where that person is in their journey and the things that are important to them. I like to ask questions like, “How do YOU measure your own success?” It always leads to a pretty interesting discussion and is a great ice-breaker at a dinner party….there is nothing like putting someone on the hot seat right away! I have heard people describe success as the balance in their bank account, and how their peers recognize them. Some describe success as how successful their children turn out.
In recent years, I have been of the opinion that success is multi-determined. I think in order to achieve success you first have to be authentic and live your life from that place while always striving to be better. Ralph Waldo Emerson said it best, “Insist on yourself. Never imitate.” Being authentic means living from a platform where you will stand up for an ideal, or act to improve the lives of others, or strike out against injustice. I believe at least at this point of my 41 year old life that my most important contribution to the world might be being who I am… and that is caring, kind, civil, decent, and a hopeful woman, friend, mother and partner. I believe that these ideals come from the person most important in my life, My Father…God! I also believe that these traits are a part of my calling from God.
I used to have these grand ideals on how I wanted to make an impact on the world and then I would consider myself successful. I wanted to change things for the better, improve lives, leave behind something positive. And yet, with the vastness of this world, and the number of people out there that will resist change … it seems impossible at times that I would ever have a big impact on this world. How can one person make an impact on the world? How can those of us who aren’t in the circle of influencers such as elected officials or influential media types effect change? It can be very overwhelming like how I feel when I am sitting by the ocean. It’s like dropping all those efforts into the ocean — the overall effect is …unnoticeable. However, I now tend to view success one life at a time. Taking those same “ocean efforts” and concentrating them in the right place can make an impact..
I am fairly certain there are many of us who would like to make an impact on the world, in some way or another. I now believe it happens one life at a time and one interaction at a time. Perhaps you can remember an interaction with someone who made you feel really good about yourself. They made you feel respected, valued, and understood. Now try to remember a time when someone's words or actions made you feel bad about yourself. You may have felt insulted or alienated.
Do you think about how others feel about themselves after they speak with you? You should. Because what you say and do impacts the way people feel about themselves. How people feel after interacting with you on a first encounter is especially important, because it will impact how they feel about you, at that moment and perhaps permanently. It’s pretty elementary actually -- If you make people feel understood and happy, they may project that good feeling onto you and feel positively about you. However, if you inadvertently insult them or make them feel ill at ease, they may project inaccurate negative traits onto you. At the very least, they will associate their good or bad feelings with you. One sentence, one idea, or one action can make a massive impact. You never know who will be touched. Confirmation from this can come from bumping into someone you helped years earlier. New doors may open after years of knocking. However, be prepared that you also may never truly know the full extent of your impact so have other reasons to do what you do.
SUCCESS…from a biblical standpoint, it is important to know that God doesn’t call us to be successful, but to be faithful. If we measure our acts by terms of success, we can get really discouraged real fast, because there will always be someone more successful in the world’s eyes. God created each of us unique and with a mission and calling. In Ephesians 2:10, He say’s, “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which he prepared in advance for us to do!” True success in His Kingdom is being faithful to that calling he gives us, especially in the face of even the worst discouragement.
Our culture of course defines success as being a little better than everyone else. As a Christ follower, I know this is not true because Jesus said that the first shall be last, and the last shall be first! In his message to the churches, Jesus does not ever mention the “success” of their church or what a great fire and brimstone sermon was delivered by their dynamic pastor or even how awesome their Sunday school program is. He never mentions that he know’s their faith…He says “I know your works.” As a lover of Christ and all He did for me, my works will determine my success in God's eyes and the faith that is truly in my heart. If we are faithful, our works will glorify Him daily and the impact will be AMAZING. And their in lies how I determine SUCCESS!
